I don’t think I’ve read this particular Salvatore, but I read plenty like it as a teenager, and I really enjoyed them. I mean, I was an overweight nerd who had a hard time socializing – pretty sure Salvatore was practically required reading.
However, part of me knew that I shouldn’t revisit his works as an adult, that I should instead let my memories of his books float in the comfortable fuzz of nostalgia.
I did not listen to myself. This is a very bad book.
Homeland a story about a race of people so evil and so irredeemable that they’ve become completely uninteresting. It’s also about a character that is so heroic and so incorruptible that he, too, is completely uninteresting. Finally, it’s about a man cucking another man out of his magical panther. This is, admittedly, very interesting, but it’s also a small part of the book.
Throughout all of this is a complete lack of subtlety, nuance, and any subtext period. You have characters with names like Mistress Malice or Mr. Evil and they’re all growling evilly and flashing wicked grins and turning to the camera while rubbing their hands in a villainous manner.
And yet somehow, impossibly, Salvatore is still terrified that the reader might miss his grand thesis statement that the drow are not very nice. So he wields omniscient narration like a butcher filleting a fish with a brick. Here’s a quote:
“You will not strike without my consent,” she warned in a tone so cold that Dinin fully understood the consequences of disobedience, “as you have done in the past.”
Drizzt did not miss the reference to Nalfein, his murdered brother. His mother knew! Malice had done nothing to punish her murderous son. Now Drizzt’s hand went up to his face, to hide an expression of horror that only could have brought him trouble in this setting.
(…)
“Do not destroy our advantage for the gain of a single kill.” An evil smile found its way back onto her bone-hued face. “But, if you learn of our enemy, …” she said.
“If the proper opportunity presents itself, …” Briza finished, guessing her mother’s wicked thoughts and throwing an equally vile smile the matron’s way.
Malice looked upon her eldest daughter with approval. Briza would prove a fine successor for the house!
Dinin’s smile became wide and lascivious. Nothing pleased the elderboy of House Do’Urden more than the opportunity for an assassination.
It’s too much!! This isn’t just telling instead of showing, it’s the author standing outside my house with a bullhorn screaming at me while I’m doing the dishes.
The result is that there are no twists, no character growth, and barely any plot at all. The heroic and honorable softboy Garyizzt Do’Stu is quite literally *born* heroic and honorable and remains that way throughout. Likewise, his evil relatives remain evil.
There are just two plot developments. One is the aforementioned panther cucking, which was pretty funny. The other one involves a convoluted misunderstanding that the narrator is only too happy to spell out approximately 200 times. There’s also a demon orgy, but our protagonist does not partake because he’s an enormous loser.
Obviously I needed more than that. I can not recommend this book to anyone.
